Not Another Monday

for those who know the ache of Miscarriage, Stillbirth and Child loss

It was the day after Father’s Day and I was especially excited to go to work that morning. The wait was over. I was going to tell my boss and colleagues that my husband and I would be welcoming a hatchling in six months. Due date: January 11th.

Keeping it secret for the customary three  months was excruciatingly difficult and seemed ridiculous, even though they weren’t able to find the heartbeat using ultrasound a couple of weeks before. “It’s not uncommon,” the gynecologist assured me.”It’s still very early and it may be too weak. We’ll pick it up next visit. All you’re other indicators are strong.”  I believed her. I had to.

I arrived at my office by 8:00am.  Once let loose the happy news traveled through the office at the speed of gossip and the morning was filled with congratulatory hugs and taps on the door from the receptionist to the partners.  I donned  the glow of expected motherhood.

The spotting started just before noon.

I raced back to my office, speaking to no one, shut the door and called my husband first. Then the gynecologist.

At 3:00pm, after drinking gallons of water as instructed on the phone, I was in an outer room waiting for another ultrasound and exam. I was doubled over by the urge to pee and the tumbling with the fear that my bladder might burst right there.

By 4:00pm I was on the doctor’s office phone scheduling a D&C.

I don’t remember the drive home. Only that I spent the next week balled into the corner of the sofa, my eyes swollen shut from crying, tarred by an ache that wouldn’t dull.

A week later I went to work and did my job just like the hundreds of other Mondays before the Monday before.

But now everything was different. Even Mondays. I’d never be a woman who had not lost a child to miscarriage. Once you’re that woman, you are always that woman.  And yes, the good news is you go on even on the difficult days. And you heal. But that person, that baby remains woven into your DNA, and your heart.

These XIZOZU were created for you to wear as touchstone of love and remembrance.
Honoring women who have lost children through miscarriage


For comfort and remembrance of miscarriage
Honoring the loss of a stillborn child


For comfort and remembrance of a stillborn child
Loss of a child


Comfort and Remembrance of the the loss of a child

The Many Journeys on the Motherhood Path

When mothers day brings sorrowIn a couple of weeks we’ll be celebrating Mother’s Day, which may be the biggest breakfast-in-bed holiday of all time. No one deserves the recognition more than moms and we’re not only thankful, but in total freakin’ awe of every mum, mommy, mama, and mother out there! We applaud every marvelous women fortunate enough to spend the day “any way she wants,” encircled by her loving children—or at the very least surrounded by sweet bouquets and cards they sent.

But our larger mission is in supporting the woman who, for a host of reasons, won’t have giggling children fluffing her pillow and presenting her with a flower-adorned tray of fruit and pancakes. We want those women to remember, you’re not alone. You’ll be among countless women cradling more leaden emotions that are equally sacred.

We’re with you too. We understand. Your journey to motherhood might be winding and complicated. XIZOZU exist to hold space for you, wherever you are on your personal path. And to provide a peaceful point of strength during your fragile times.

These XIZOZU were created to embrace all the shapes of motherhood:

I Chose to Not Have ChildrenI Foster Parent
I Struggle with InfertilityI Raised My Siblings
I Lost a Child by MiscarriageI'm Raising My Grandchildren
I’m a Mother of A StillbornI Lost my Child
I’m a Single MotherI Lost my Daughter
I’m an Adoptive Parent I Lost my Son
I’m a Biological MotherI’m a Surrogate Mother

The Nudge I Needed

I’ll be honest – launching XIZOZU™ has been among the most rewarding and the most challenging projects I’ve ever undertaken. The times when doubts creep in and I wonder…is this really a thing?…are thankfully few, but the second-guessing does happen. Then I get an email like this…

2/10/18

My XIZOZU arrived yesterday, it was a gift from my mother-in-law and I haven’t taken it off. It’s like a source of renewable energy that I can draw from whenever my grief weakens me…I love that no one else knows its meaning. People just think it’s beautiful. I do too. Thank you. Thank you.

M. in Massachusetts

…and I know exactly where my path is leading. Thank you universe.

What’s Wrong with You? | The ZIZOZU 8

This week’s eight things that are worth sharing with friends

Issue #4: What’s Wrong With Me?  

Nothing. Nothing is wrong. It was a week of learning about how folks handle their self-doubts, perceived flaws and spectacular failures. Next time you’re feeling down about yourself remember: you’re not alone. Figuratively or literally.
  1. MILLENNIAL. Maybe you’re one of them and according to Simon Sinek, here’s the way to handle it.
  2. GRIEF BRAIN. It’s a thing. But it’s temporary. And you’re not alone, many XIZOZU customers wear at least one medal honoring a lost loved one as a place to direct their love or a place to find strength and comfort.
  3. YOU’RE OUT OF BREATH. You’re doing it wrong. Or I was. Here’s how to breathe specifically to relax, quiet anxiety, and even fall back to sleep.
  4. IT’S ALL IN YOUR HEAD. The traveling exhibit Mindful – exploring mental health through art will be at the Fuller Craft Museum in Brockton, Massachusetts through April 2018.
  5. THE BLUES. We all get ’em. Make the most of it with this worth-your-time music documentary: Blues America: Part 1 and Part 2
  6. OH BURGERS! I’m a vegetarian, except for those days when I eat meat. Try this simple approach for a healthier you and planet.
  7. YAY! YOU’VE BEEN A FAILURE. Successful entrepreneurs, authors, comedians, top YouTube creators, and more share trues stories about their complete mess ups in the What’s Wrong with You Podcast.
  8. WRONG vs. RIGHT Can science determine human values? Sam Harris’ The Moral Landscape is next up on my nonfiction reading list. What’s next up on yours?

A customer's keychain with XIZOZU medals of honor—reminders of what's important.CUSTOMER LOVE NOTES:
“I locked the door and saw my XIZOZU. Started the car and there they were. It’s like mini meditations all day long!” —L. (USA)

The new XIZOZU™ keychains are super popular with the non-necklace wearers.


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The XIZOZU 8 is a regular collection of eight helpful or entertaining ideas that we think our friends and fans will enjoy.  Subscribe and get it delivered  straight to your inbox.

Information worth sharing with friends

custom intention jewelry